Does This Belly Band Make Me Look Fat?

There are many things about pregnancies that can really shake a good husband up.  The irrational mood swings, the hormonal crying, the sickness all the time, the food cravings, the desire to shoot the person who knocked you up as your puking your lunch up.  Its not easy on them.  In all honesty, Chris is taking it like a champ.  He knows just when to hug, just when to go away, just when to reappear, just when to tell me to put my big girl pants on.  He has never really fawned all over me (thank goodness!), but with my pregnancy he has become attentive in ways that I never imagined.

So why then do I torture him with questions like “Does this belly band make me look fat?”  What do I think the right answer to this question really is anyway?  If he says yes, I’ll start to cry because I’m fat.  If he says no, I’ll start to cry because I don’t have a baby bump yet.  Its a no win situation for him.  And yet, I continue to do it to him.

At least once a day, I turn to the side and ask him if I look pregnant.  Again, there’s no answer here that will NOT result in tears.  But his answer is the worst answer you could possibly give.  Every time he says, “You look like you normally do.”

Now, this is a catastrophic answer on so many levels.  First, I am getting bigger.  I may not look like I’m pregnant yet, but I definitely have more stomach than I’ve ever had before.  So the fact that to my husband I have always looked this fat is, well, worthy of a good cry.  When he says it, I usually go into a horrible rage, completely with tears and pumping fists.

“So, you think I always look fat?  Are you saying that I’ve looked fat the entire 10 years we’ve been together?  Are you saying that you married a fat chick?”

And yet the very next day, I turn to the side and ask him the same question.

He’s getting a little better.  Now, he denies the existence of any belly at all.  When I ask him, he simply says, “I don’t notice anything.  You look skinny.”

And I cry again.  Because on one hand I want to have a baby bump so badly and on the other hand I don’t want to blow up and get fat and so the use of the word “skinny” reminds me that I will never have a 20 year old body ever again.  I’ll be forced to wear Mom Jeans and power walk on the weekends.

And yet, the very next day…   Its a vicious cycle.

Now, he has outsmarted me.  I ask if I look fat.  He asks what I want him to say.  Everybody’s happy.  See?  I told you he was good at this husband thing.

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4 Comments

Filed under Changes, Husbands, Marriage, pregnancy

4 responses to “Does This Belly Band Make Me Look Fat?

  1. Well I want to avoid this as long as possible. I’m already a handful as a wife without being 50/50 wanting a bump and wanting a six-pack. No winning, I suppose.

  2. Erin

    I went through the exact same thing….. my husband always said “You’re starting to look a little pregnant now…”

    ….LOL but now I’m at the point that he says (without me asking) “HOLY! You’re VERY VERY pregnant!” 🙂

  3. Ohhh, I forgot how it drove me crazy in the beginning because people would always say “you’re not showing at ALL!” But I would notice I was “pooching” out a bit more so I would get really upset, thinking “I haven’t always had this pooch! You calling me fat?!” I feel your pain.

  4. Mendi McCormick

    I know you want the bump….I promise it’ll come 🙂 My is small, and I’m 17 weeks today! I’ll tell you one thing to watch out for is those BOOBS! Holy cow…now those are scary 😉