You Make Me Sick!

For the past few weeks, I have been waking up every morning with a bloody nose.  Its the strangest thing.  I’ve never had one before in my life, and suddenly I have one every day!  I thought at first it was part of getting over my Christmas cold.  Maybe my nose had been traumatized and was revolting.  But its been weeks now and its still going on.  Now, I think its because of the weather.  Connecticut has been FREEZING lately!  See?  Here is today’s forecast:


So, I’m thinking since its so freaking cold and the air is so freaking dry that my nose is shriveling up and dying.

Yesterday I got this brilliant idea to put a humidifyer in our bedroom.  I thought maybe adding a little hot steam to the room at night my help keep my nose from falling off my face.

Chris was completely against it.

He said it would make us sick.  It wouldn’t help my nose.  It was a bad idea.  I told him to hush up and take me to Target!  So, we get to Target and pick out a great humidifyer.  Actually, it was almost a great humidifyer.  The great humidifyer was the one shaped like a frog, but Chris drew the line and so we just got a plain Jane Vick’s humidifyer.  And when we got home, Chris put it together for me, tucked me in, and I fell asleep dreaming of nose bleed-free mornings.

This morning when we woke up, my nose was great!  It wasn’t bleeding.  It wasn’t even stuffy.  But I did notice my throat was a little scratchy.  Chris and I turned to eachother at the exact same time.

“I have a cold!” we shouted.

What the crap, humidifyer?  I thought you were suppose to make my nose supple and lush?  Why’d you have to make us sick, too?  Now, I have to box you up and take you back to Target and when they ask me why I am returning the product, I’m going to have to tell them its because you’re a jerk.

Way to go, humidifyer.



Filed under Marriage

10 responses to “You Make Me Sick!

  1. Lori

    No matter if the baby is causing the nosebleeds–I think you’d be better off with the froggy humidifier. I mean, who wouldn’t be?! It’s adorable!

  2. I think it’s baby bean causing the nose bleeds. I have them almost daily as well, and my dr. says it’s normal in pregnancy! Good luck 🙂

  3. Bloody noses are common in pregnancy.. i had them all the time.. it was completely horrible.. and we bought the frog humidifier for our daughter, and its not so great… you were better off with the other one!

  4. Alison


    I think your nose bleeds might be a side effect from being pregnant, my nurse keeps telling me that’s why I have them. She recommended a “cool mist humidifier”, I guess they are better then other ones because they “breed bacteria”. Also you can try putting a little vasaline on a q-tip and rubbing it in your nose before you fall asleep, and the last tip she gave me was to try a saline nose mist, I think she named “Ocean Mist” but I don’t remember exactly.

  5. archiveslives

    I’ve never woken up with a bloody nose before–I’m pretty sure it would traumatise me for life (I have issues with blood). I do wake up with stuffy noses and scratchy throats, though. It always goes away by noon.

  6. Chris Jarrett

    Do you have your heat programmed to go off during the night while you are sleeping? I know in the winter time if my heater switches off in the night (which it should, but it should keep the house a bit lower than when you are awake) I get a bloody nose occasionally. So usually when i’m awake i’ll leave the heat on about 72 and it is programmed to keep the house around 67 or 68 while I sleep. If it drops below 65 I start having nose bleeding issues.

    Good luck!

  7. I totally wanted that frog humidifier too!!!
    Is the bloody nose a pregnancy side effect? My pregnant friend mentioned that too.

  8. hmmmm not good. Maybe you will have to sleep with tissues up your nose…that will be real sexy too! 🙂

  9. My 3rd grade spelling teacher is hanging her head in shame.

    ~ Katie

  10. Hate to go all proofreader on you, but it’s “humidifier”. Still, a funny post. Thanks.