A Serious Case of the Waddles


This week I am 22 weeks pregnant.  And, man, do I feel it!  I’m getting used to my belly and I’m loving all the moving that the Bean is doing (although if he spends one more night kicking me in the ribs, we’re gonna have some serious problems).  But I’m starting to notice that things that at one time were so easy for me now take a lot of pre-planning and manuevering.

Take standing up, for instance.  I love me some cushy furniture.  You can’t overstuff something enough for me.  The further down I sink, the happier I am.  But in the past few weeks, the further down I sink, the less likely I am to be able to get back up again.  I have this chair in my living room that I watch TV in.  Its my chair.  Its where I live.  But lately, I’m having some issues with my chair.  It doesn’t seem to want to let me get up.  I sit down just fine, but when it comes time to stand back up, I have to roll myself so that I’m sitting on the front edge of the seat and then lift myself up with my arms.

I’m definitely doing the pregnant lady stand.  You know the one.  Where it looks like I’m going to drop this kid out of me any minute now.  Yeah, that one.  And its not so attractive.

I’m also having trouble breathing a lil’ bit.  My nose is stuffy all the time (which I have read can be a side effect of pregnancy…something about hormones or something…Or it could be that its, like, 4 degrees outside…),  but putting the stuffy nose aside, I’m just breathing differently.  Really short, shallow breaths.  And when I walk up stairs, I literally need to take a nap once I reach the top.  Its becoming more of a problem at night though.  I’m snoring!!!  I’ve never been a snorer in my life!  But lately, I am WAKING MYSELF UP SNORING!!  The other night when I took the train down to New York, I fell asleep on the train and I actually heard myself snoring over the noise of a TRAIN and so I woke up.  Its really, really sexy.

And speaking of walking up stairs and sexiness, I’m walking weird.  Like I’ve got a watermelon between my legs.  I’m a waddler now.  When I was little and we’d go to the beach, there were hundreds of pictures of me standing with my legs wide apart because I had gotten sand between them.  That’s what I look like now.  I look like I just got off a horse.  A very wide horse.  I can sort of keep the waddling to a minimum when I concentrate on it, but when I’m not paying attention and I’m just walking around, I kind of look like a duck.


I also think I may be getting a smidge more hormonal because every time I complain to Chris about one of these new “joys” of pregnancy, he just laughs and says, “Just wait till you get bigger.”  And then I want to kick him in the shins and drop a piano on his head.

Yeah, lets blame that on the hormones…


Filed under Changes, Husbands, Marriage, pregnancy

5 responses to “A Serious Case of the Waddles

  1. archiveslives

    How sad. Although, I already want to take a nap every time I climb stairs, and I am not 22 weeks pregnant (or any weeks pregnant, for that matter). That is a little more sad, in my opinion.

  2. Each woman’s experience during her pregnancy varies from the other. Yet the perceptions of what lies ahead during the pregnancy period invariably remain the same. Every woman, when she first knows about her pregnancy, is immediately filled with a sense of awe, as there is a new life growing in her womb. She may also feel ill equipped to deal with the physical and emotional changes during pregnancy. Throughout her pregnancy, she will constantly be worried about the well being of her child. Towards the end of her pregnancy period, she will feel a sense of expectancy.

  3. Lori

    This is the exact blog I feel like writing–I feel like a gigantic pregnant lady today! I’ve got the waddle and the shortness of breath when I attempt to bend over, even just a little. And my husband, just like your husband, gives me the same “Just wait until you get bigger” line. That’s not helping!!!

  4. Kristin

    Can you please post some belly pictures? 🙂